27 conflict resolution skills to use with your team and your customers

Throughout my career I’ve learned that while experiencing workplace conflict isn’t ideal, it’s actually pretty common. Companies are made up of employees with diverse working styles, priorities, and preferences.

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Chances are, you’re going to clash with someone at some point due to one of those differences. Conflict resolution skills are the key to managing those workplace conflicts in a professional manner.

In this article, I’ll guide you through different conflict management skills and conflict resolution strategies that you can use to navigate your next difficult situation. Whether you end up navigating conflict in your personal life, with your colleagues, or even with your customers — these resources are sure to come in handy.

Table of Contents

• What is conflict resolution?
• Conflict Management Skills
• Conflict Resolution Skills
• Conflict Resolution Strategies
• Conflict Resolution Examples

Conflict Management Skills

Conflict management can be approached using a variety of different styles. While these styles may differ, every method employs the same management skills.

Below are some of the core skills and characteristics that you’ll need to adopt if you want to effectively manage workplace conflicts.

1. Active Listening

If you work with customers like I do, you know that active listening is an incredibly important skill to have. But that skillset extends beyond just customer facing work, and is foundational to any conflict resolution strategy.

Active listening means focusing intently on the speaker, engaging with them as they talk to show them that you’re listening and understanding their words. The hardest part about active listening is not teeing up what you’re going to say in response! Active listening goes beyond just hearing the words someone is saying and requires effort to truly understand their point of view.

This skill is commonly used in customer-facing professions. Salespeople, for example, are often taught strategies that start with active listening so that they can better connect with customers during a pitch.

Active listening starts with having an open mind (and open ears, of course) When practicing active listening, ask clarifying questions if you’re unsure about something the speaker says to avoid any misunderstanding.

Pro tip: When dealing with conflict, pay attention to the other person’s phrasing and respond using their same wording. An example of this is, “So what I’m hearing you say is…” This approach shows the speaker that you’re listening and also helps clear up any confusion.

2. Emotional Intelligence

Emotional intelligence (also known as EQ), is the ability to understand and manage your own emotions as well as the emotions of other people.

Using this skill in conflict management is key to ensuring you can read the other party’s emotions and navigate them accordingly. If you can effectively interpret your opposition’s emotions, it’ll be easier to communicate with them without provoking them.

Pro tip: Pay attention to the other party’s nonverbal cues as well as their verbal cues. If you detect confusion, anger, or frustration in their body language or their words, you can diffuse the situation or course-correct the conversation to avoid further conflict.

3. Patience

Patience is a virtue for a reason (it doesn’t always come easily). Human beings are complex, thus making person-to-person conflicts complicated to overcome.

One of the reasons that conflict resolution is so difficult is because people don’t like to be wrong and will often hold their stance on an issue because of it. If you’re looking to resolve a conflict with a person like this, you’ll need patience.

It’s important to keep in mind that the problem may take time to solve, even if the solution feels obvious. Sometimes, conflicts require additional time to resolve so that every participant has a chance to feel heard and understood.

Pro tip: I’ve seen things get messy when the resolution to a conflict feels rushed. While most of us prefer to avoid conflict and would love to just “get the process over with,” rushing the resolution can make people feel like they’re left out of the decision-making process. If you truly want a mutually agreeable solution to the conflict, practice patience in the process.

4. Impartiality

Another reason conflicts can be difficult to resolve is because they don’t always stay focused on the conflict itself.

Some parties may use the conflict as an opportunity to air previous grievances or impart personal attacks. When this happens, the overarching problem at hand now gets pushed aside as the parties focus on these grievances.

In conflict resolution, you want to try to keep the conflict separate from the individual people who are involved with it. Don’t target the individual person or their characteristics and keep it focused on the facts — like concrete events, details, interactions, etc.

Pro tip: While you might be tempted to tackle the historical issues that just surfaced, don’t deprioritize the bigger situation at hand. Doing so delays the overall solution and allows more time for resentments to grow. Tackle the historical grievances when the time is right, but don’t lose focus on the main issue.

5. Positivity

Both a negative attitude and a positive attitude are contagious, so be wary of which one you bring to the conversation.

Try to approach these situations with a constructive mindset and look for common ground. Be solution-oriented and check the negative emotions at the door. Being positive with your conflict management actions is a great way to keep the conversation moving forward.

Pro tip: If you’re feeling anxious or find yourself catastrophizing about the worst possible outcome, I challenge you to flip the script. It can be helpful to visualize a positive outcome of the situation before heading into the resolution so that you’re walking into the conversation with a positive mindset.

6. Open Communication

Unfortunately, relationships don’t always revert back to normal for the people involved in a conflict once a resolution has been reached. Chances are, that relationship will need to be nurtured and possibly even treated delicately afterwards to avoid future conflicts.

Open communication makes it easier for participants to address any new challenges with ease and avoids risking any progress they’ve already made.

Pro tip: An open line of communication is the best approach for fostering a healthy, long-term relationship. By continuing to share information openly and honestly with the other party, even after the conflict resolution has been decided on, ensures you remain on the path to relationship repair.

While these skills can help you and your team manage conflicts, you might be wondering what they look like in practice.

In the next section, I’ll show you some of the ways that you can use these skills to drive effective resolutions to conflict.

These management skills are critical for successful conflict resolution and using them results in effective, long-term solutions.

By applying these skills at the right time, you help reduce miscommunication, de-escalate tension, and create more opportunities for mutual understanding.

If you’re not quite sure how to put these skills into practice, I’ve listed some tips for you to consider when approaching your next conflict.

1. Use ‘yes, and’ as well as ‘I’ statements.

As human beings, we’re quick to be defensive when we feel criticized or like we are to blame. When we use language like “no” and “yes, but” to start our sentences, we can come off as defensive and uncooperative.

Try changing those “I hear you, but” statements into “Yes, I understand, and” statements that build off one another, rather than tearing each other down. Using yes-and statements moves the conversation forward more than “yes, but” statements.

Similarly, a series of statements that begin with “you” can come across as blaming. The conversation should be focused on shared goals and outcomes, not about who did what wrong.

By using “I” statements instead, your argument becomes more about your emotions, opinions, personal beliefs, and morals, rather than about all the things you don’t like about the opposing party.

It’s harder to disagree with opinions or personal feelings that you strongly believe in. Additionally, you can try explaining the impact that the behavior or issue at hand is having on you.

Pro tip: For example, use “I feel stressed when you’re late to our meetings because I’ve prepared a tight agenda” rather than “You’re always late to meetings!” or something similar. This strategy can really help de-escalate conflict and help create understanding.

2. Don’t point fingers.

Jumping on the offensive is counterproductive. While it’s tempting to want to read off your list of grievances, coming in on offense actually creates a negative starting point.

And pointing fingers feels a lot like stepping into quicksand — once you’ve started the blame game, it becomes nearly impossible to work your way out of it. Avoid blaming from the get-go so you can keep the conversation on track.

Blaming others also creates a space where people tend to shut down, or don’t feel safe voicing their opinions. This is the opposite of what you want in conflict resolution.

As Dr. Pat LaDouceur says, “Blame is a silent saboteur that undermines relationships, hinders productivity, and damages self-worth.”

Pro tip: An easy way to break the blame cycle is to focus on using “I” statements versus “You” statements. Focus on shared responsibility and contribution instead of assigning blame.

3. Let the person explain themselves, and actively listen.

If you take only one thing away from this article, let it be that active listening is the cornerstone of conflict resolution.

You cannot come to a mutual agreement without listening, empathizing, and trying to understand the other person(s).

While we naturally want to defend ourselves and make our voices heard, when we do this we move away from actively listening to the other person. We then start focusing on our rebuttals which causes us to lose the empathy we were actively building for the other party.

If this feels hard for you, you’re not alone. Moving from “hearing” to actually “listening” is something that we have to actively train our brains to do, because we aren’t used to it.

Pro tip: Let the other person explain themselves, uninterrupted. I really like Dr. Brené Brown’s approach of using a statement like “Help me understand why this is so important to you,” while actively listening with the goal of trying to understand their point of view.

4. Find common ground.

There’s a good chance that you and the other person have more in common than you think. When you’re angry or hurt it can be hard to remember this, but try to think about where you share common ground and use that to frame your conversation.

Identify your shared goals or values and use this to build a foundation towards a resolution. This could be your company-wide goals or you could even bring up their individual work goals and how it aligns with the goals of your role.

When both parties realize they’re working towards the same outcome, it can be easier to find a resolution to the conflict at hand.

Pro tip: An example that I’ve seen work well here (and that I’ve personally used) is: “I know that you really care about our customers and you want them to be successful with our product. I want the exact same thing for them, which is why…”

5. Maintain a calm tone.

It goes without saying that remaining calm during conflict (especially in the workplace) is imperative. Our personal identity and our jobs are deeply intertwined, making it natural for us to have an emotional response to interactions that happen at work.

Remaining level-headed during conflict allows you to think rationally about a solution that appeases both parties. We don’t always hear our own tone the way someone else does, so we have to go into conflict resolution actively ready to exercise this skill.

When you enter the conflict resolution meeting, you should be calm and ready to discuss with consideration for differing perspectives.

Pro tip: I love to do something mindful or soothing before I walk into something stressful — like practicing a quick meditation, listening to a favorite song, or even watching a funny short video to reduce stress hormones.

6. Show a willingness to compromise or collaborate.

In most significant conflicts, the goal is to come to a mutual agreement for both parties. This means that you’ll need to show up to the conversation willing to compromise or collaborate.

By compromising or collaborating, you avoid creating a win-lose situation, allowing you to preserve or rebuild the relationship.

Pro tip: You’ll need to weigh what you really care about and decide what you’d be willing to let go of. Your compromise should never betray your values, and while each situation varies, you’ll need to “choose your battles wisely” and be willing to accommodate or compromise in some situations.

7. Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable.

I’m a big fan of Dr. Brown’s inclusion of vulnerability as a conflict management skill. Brown says that vulnerability is crucial to conflict resolution, and that by being vulnerable in conflict, we humanize the other party and build trust.

When we allow ourselves to be vulnerable by doing things like expressing our emotions, we create an environment that fosters understanding and ultimately helps us find common ground.

Conflict manager Michelle Phaneuf writes, “Exposing yourself and your thoughts will humanize you in the eyes of others. If your actions are perceived as genuine and authentic, it will result in a release of aggression in the other party. Shoulders will drop. Postures will relax. Positions will soften.”

Dr. Brown also emphasizes that vulnerability is not weakness but rather a sign of courage that is required both for building connections and resolving conflicts.

Pro tip: Not sure how to “be vulnerable?” Start with being open, honest, and kind. Vulnerability means letting your guard down and speaking your truth.

8. Don’t talk behind people’s backs.

The last thing your current conflict needs is more fuel on the fire. What happens between you and the opposing party should stay between you and them, unless it’s absolutely necessary to divulge the details of your conflict.

If truly necessary, you can confide in your supervisor or someone in a higher position than you about the conflict in order to get help with navigating the situation, or just to have a support system.

In a workplace conflict I was going through, I talked to my boss frequently about it. Not only to get her advice, but also to keep her informed on how the relationship was progressing.

This helped me to feel like I was getting it “off my chest” while also getting sound advice from a trusted source.

In short — don’t share details with your colleagues or subordinates. You don’t want word getting around, things to get misconstrued, and the conflict to escalate. Plus it’s just bad workplace etiquette.

Pro tip: Your company’s HR department could be another avenue to consider if you need a neutral third party to talk to. Just be sure to confirm what information would be “on the record” if you bring them into the fold.

9. Don’t take anything personally.

Raise your hand if you’ve ever had a customer yell at you! (It’s me — I’m raising my hand). As difficult as those interactions are, it’s important to remember that a conflict with a customer or team member is typically not a conflict with you, personally.

Conflicts like these usually stem from a frustration point related to your company’s product or policies, or it could even be related to unspoken expectations that other people have.

While it can be really hard to separate yourself personally from the conflict, if you don’t do this you risk becoming defensive or combative about the situation. This can hinder the resolution and make it harder to bridge the relationship.

Pro tip: Think of it the same way we are taught to think about feedback. “Feedback is about the work, not the person,” right? If you can separate yourself from the conflict and take a step back, it becomes easier to accept compromise and collaborate (leading to a quicker and better resolution).

10. Pay close attention to nonverbal communication.

When I was taking a nonverbal communication class in college, I had no idea at the time how often I would use those skills in the workplace. I learned that since not everyone is great at handling conflict head-on, some people tend to avoid conflict outwardly yet still carry that conflict internally.

That’s why it’s important to pay attention to people’s nonverbal communication.

For example, when someone says, “I’m fine,” you can tell they’re not fine if they avert their eyes. Or if you’re talking to someone who tenses up or avoids you physically, you should check in with them and create a safe environment for them to be open and honest with you.

Some people struggle to come out and say what they’re thinking when it comes to conflict, but paying attention to their non-verbal cues allows you to recognize (and mitigate) potential conflict.

Pro tip: Don’t forget to check your own nonverbal communication. Consider whether your body language, tone of voice, and facial expressions match your words. Try not to cross your arms and avoid things like rolling your eyes or avoiding eye contact.

11. Prioritize resolving the conflict over being right.

The scope of a workplace conflict likely goes beyond just you. It can be representative of company policies that make a customer angry, or internal processes implemented by management that create strain between two internal teams.

Because it goes beyond just you, when trying to resolve the conflict it’s important to take a step back and adopt a broader perspective. Solving the problem is going to create a better outcome than focusing on being right.

Even if you had nothing to do with the policy or process that made the other party angry, focus on finding a resolution versus trying to make your own POV heard.

Pro tip: In my experience, when a customer is taking their anger out on me, I have the best results when I slow down, listen, and empathize with them. Even if whatever they’re angry about isn’t my fault, I apologize for the poor experience they’re having and let them vent. Once they’re done, I tell them what I’m going to do next to help make it right.

This strategy has served me well in my career, and towards the end of the call the customer is usually much calmer and often apologizes to me for their outburst. At the end of the day, they just want the issue solved, and it’s my job to help fix it.

12. Know when to apologize and forgive.

An important part of successful conflict resolution is being willing to be held accountable and knowing when to own up to your actions. Accountability allows us to learn the consequences of our actions and empowers us to set things right.

Therapist Kimmy Wu says that shifting away from blaming the other person and towards taking accountability starts with asking yourself: “What part did I play in this situation?” From there, the next steps include taking responsibility for your actions and apologizing for any harm you may have caused.

Easy, right? (Ha!) Of course not. As we’ve discussed at length, we’re humans. And when we feel we’ve been wronged, it’s difficult to come out and say, “I’m sorry.”

Don’t let pride deter you from making amends with the opposing party. The best relationships (whether personal or professional) are built on trust, which relies on accountability.

Pro tip: Even if you find yourself resistant to forgive and forget, remember that these relationships are professional and you’ll need to keep a professional attitude from here on out.

13. Focus on the conflict at hand and not past ones.

When a conflict comes to a head, there’s a good chance that you’ll begin recounting past microaggressions that led up to this moment. This can lead to even more frustration with the other party, and in the heat of the moment you may be tempted to bring them up.

Save pent-up frustrations about past conflicts (that aren’t directly related to the issue at hand) for another time, and focus on the present.

Pro tip: The “48-hour rule” can be helpful here. The rule says that if you’re tempted to confront someone about something, give yourself 48 hours to “sit on it” and then see if you still feel like it’s important enough to confront them about.

14. Use humor, when appropriate.

Laughter can be a powerful tool to bridge connection and bring people together. While it may not always be appropriate (like making a joke about a sensitive topic, or someone’s feelings), you can certainly try to use humor to lighten the mood.

Humor can disrupt the power struggle and ease tensions during a conflict when used appropriately.

Pro tip: I’ve used humor in tense situations, but only when I first “read the room” and the energy of the other party. This is where EQ becomes important.

Conflict is tough to navigate, and no one enjoys being angry. If you think the opposite party would appreciate a little humor, it could help alleviate tension and pave the way for a smoother outcome.

Now that we’ve reviewed conflict resolution skills, let’s take a look at a few strategies that can help you put these skills to good use.

Conflict Resolution Strategies

The Thomas-Kilmann Model of conflict resolution describes five strategies for addressing conflict. The five strategies lie on two axes: assertive and cooperative.

Each of the strategies ranges between assertiveness and unassertiveness and cooperative and uncooperative. No strategy is right or wrong; there’s an appropriate time to use each one.

1. Accommodating

While being accommodating can be beneficial to conflict resolution, I’m definitely guilty of falling too far into this category myself. The accommodating style has an element of self-sacrifice when accommodating to satisfy the other person. Not every conflict needs to be a war — conflicts worth accommodating are those battles that are strategically lost to win the war.

However, this style can lead to some parties being taken advantage of, subsequently causing resentment if the individuals involved are not careful.

Here’s an example:

I had a colleague ask me to pull reports for our customer for an upcoming presentation, but they didn’t give me any specifics on the datasets they wanted to include.

I pulled the traditional reports we used for these presentations, but when I presented the reports to the colleague, they asked me to re-run the reports to include additional data points.

While they didn’t specify a preference up front, they took issue with the final outcome. I could have pushed back here, but I simply accommodated them and re-ran the reports since it was in the best interest of the customer.

Pro tip: I did give this colleague feedback about their request, because while I didn’t mind being accommodating in this instance, I wanted to avoid being taken advantage of in the future. If this continued to happen, I would have eventually become resentful.

2. Avoiding

The avoiding conflict strategy is reserved for individuals who are more inclined to be unassertive and uncooperative in mitigating conflict.

Generally, this is an apathetic approach — people who adopt this strategy want no parts of the conflict and would rather wait for it to blow over. We all likely know someone who falls into this category — they might change the conversation if something tense gets brought up or ignore an issue altogether.

This strategy is best for small annoyances, one-off mistakes, and issues that would otherwise be worsened by addressing them. However, if used too often or for major conflicts, the individual runs the risk of not having their needs met.

Here’s an example:

If your co-worker frequently talks on speakerphone in the break room, it may be irritating to you (and others), but you may decide not to address it in order to avoid creating a potential conflict.

If it’s a one-time issue, leave it be. It’s likely not worth the 2-minute discussion in the all-hands meeting. But if the issue feels important to you, then this may not be the strategy for you.

3. Collaborating

If you’re focused on the long-term relationship and outcome, try using the collaborative style of conflict resolution. As you can likely infer, the collaborating style is about working together.

The collaborating style involves being assertive and cooperative while working with the other parties to find a solution that makes everyone happy.

This strategy works well for minimizing negative feelings and creating a mutually agreed upon outcome.

Here’s an example:

It’s no secret that sales and customer success can have friction, especially when sales is involved in the upsell process.

I’ve seen a disjointed post-sales organization struggle to find the right way to manage upsell and expansion, causing friction between both sales and customer success. The CSM wanted to protect the customer from aggressive sales interactions, but the AE was tasked with finding upsell and expansion dollars.

To solve this, both teams had to collaborate to find a process that incentivized both the sales team and the customer success team while still remaining customer-centric.

Now the AEs and CSMs work together on the account, both with a financial incentive to drive expansion and upsell opportunities.

4. Competing

Assertive and uncooperative, the competing conflict style is an intense approach to resolving grievances.

It’s not uncommon for a competing conflict resolution strategy to yield a positive outcome for one party and a negative outcome for the other. I don’t recommend using this one within your organization, as it is not designed to build relationships.

However, it can be used in instances where you care about the outcome but not necessarily the relationship, such as in competitive sales situations.

Here’s an example:

Salespeople and lawyers may use this strategy to get the best outcomes. I’ve seen salespeople leverage this conflict style to negotiate a deal and get the contract signed.

On the flip side, this conflict style can be really disparaging to work with in a cross-functional capacity. When it comes to internal communication, steer clear of this approach if you want to build cross-functional relationships or get results internally.

5. Compromising

People tend to compromise during conflicts when they are assertive and cooperative in negotiating a solution.

This strategy may sound harsh, but it’s usually employed when you’re short on time and need to move on to the next project.

The compromise is based on the most important and urgent facts that can bring about a decision that works for the time being.

Here’s an example:

My team was working on a rebrand of one of our initiatives and we couldn’t agree on what we should call it. While it felt like we all wanted to go in different directions, we realized that our decision paralysis was delaying us substantially. I eventually suggested that we compromise on the final rebrand in order to avoid further delays.

At the end of the day, the naming convention wasn’t as important to me as the ability to keep things moving and deliver on the initiative, so I felt like compromising was the best approach.

Curious which conflict resolution style you lean towards? Check out this conflict management style quiz to find out!

In addition to these five conflict resolution strategies, the following two tips can accompany any of the above to reach a resolution.

Tip 1: Set boundaries.

Before diving headfirst into the conflict discussion, establish boundaries up front for all parties to follow. These might include the following:

• Reminding everyone that the conflict is not personal.
• Asking everyone to keep the discussion confidential.
• Trusting everyone to manage their emotions and not make outbursts, hurtful remarks, or make untrue statements.
• Reminding the group that the focus should be on joint resolution.

Tip 2: Have a third-party weigh-in.

In some cases, the conflict may simply be too emotional to address yourself. I’m a big proponent of having a mediator or a neutral third party get involved when this is the case.

If you’re afraid of retaliation, discrimination, or other inappropriate or illegal ramifications for addressing conflict, I’d suggest reaching out to HR to be your third party. They can address or mediate the conflict if need be (and chances are you’ll want your supervisor to attend as well).

A neutral third party can either act as a sounding board to retrieve the facts from each party to achieve a resolution, or they may simply guide the conversation and keep time so that you don’t waste time having an unproductive conversation.

Next, I’ve highlighted some conflict resolution examples based on common conflicts in the workplace.

Conflict Resolution Examples

Conflicts can emerge from several different factors, including miscommunication, prioritization, and unmet expectations.

Below, I’ll describe three scenarios that depict each of these common causes for conflict and how to resolve them with one of the strategies listed above.

Scenario 1: Unmet Expectations

Marcus and Ollie work at TechTak, a start-up that provides marketing and sales solutions to small businesses. They’re working on a pitch presentation for their biggest client to date, SaveSend.

The presentation is scheduled for next Thursday with Maria, the program director at SaveSend, so it’s important that Marcus and Ollie finish it on time.

At the alignment meeting last week, TechTak’s client services department head, Riley, delegated the presentation content to Marcus’s team and gave the design responsibility to Ollie.

On the Tuesday before the presentation date, Riley sent an email to check the status of the presentation and how well the two teams were working together.

Unfortunately, Ollie hadn’t received any content from Marcus’s team to design the presentation around. On the other hand, Marcus hadn’t received creative direction from Ollie so his team could write enough content.

With Thursday’s deadline approaching and no presentation draft in sight, Ollie and Marcus are both frustrated and anxious to complete the project on time. How should both teams resolve this conflict?

Let’s look at the facts:

• Time is of the essence and delaying the presentation isn’t an option.
• Both Ollie and Marcus need more information to complete their assigned tasks.
• The line of communication has been opened by a third party, Riley.

The Resolution

Based on what we know about each conflict resolution strategy, the collaborative style would work best for this situation. Marcus and Ollie are under a time crunch, and the work will need to be done in the next two days.

They can use Riley as a neutral third party to help them outline the specifications of the project and assign strict deadlines that both parties can agree on.

Scenario 2: Out of Order

Brenda and Candace both work as administrative assistants for the local credit union MetroMoney. Their roles are highly dependent upon one another, and as a result, they’ve become good friends both at work and in their personal lives.

At MetroMoney, Brenda focuses on scheduling appointments for new members to open accounts while Candace prepares the documents they’ll need to sign when they arrive.

Due to the nature of the role, Brenda’s workflow moves much faster than Candace’s. Brenda can schedule about 10 appointments each day while Candace can prepare about five document packages in her shift.

Occasionally, some customer’s documents aren’t prepared at the time of their appointment as Candace prepares documents in the order that appointments are set, not the date on which they’re scheduled.

On this particular day, Brenda asked Candace to expedite the documents for two customers who were set to arrive soon. Candace responded that she couldn’t because her cadence would be out of order.

Instead, she asked Brenda to reschedule the customers’ appointments for a week later when their documents would be ready.

How can Brenda and Candace work together to make sure the customers will have their documents when they arrive at their appointment?

Let’s look at the facts:

• Brenda and Candace both have goals to achieve each day, neither of which can be ignored completely.
• Timing is important, but there is some wiggle room for both parties to work within.
• If the customers’ documents aren’t ready, they won’t be able to open their accounts, which affects the bottom line for both Brenda and Candace.

The Resolution

We know that Brenda and Candace have a strong relationship and some leeway in solving this issue, so they could collaborate to solve the conflict.

By asserting their needs and cooperating with each other, Brenda can reschedule the customers’ appointments for the end of the week, and Candace can reorganize her workload to prioritize their documents first.

The benefit of collaborating on this resolution is that both Brenda and Cadance can maintain their otherwise seamless working relationship without any hard feelings later on.

Scenario 3: The Interview

Sadie is applying for a role as a customer service representative at Humbolt Hardware, a hardware subscription service for DIY home renovators.

Jim, the hiring manager, scheduled her interview for Wednesday at noon and Sadie agreed to arrive at that time.

On Wednesday, Sadie logged in to Zoom for her interview with Jim, but ten minutes passed and he didn’t show up or respond to her email asking if he could still make it.

An hour later, Jim responds to Sadie’s email saying he’s online and ready for the interview.

Sadie was unavailable and didn’t see the email until later that evening. When she responded, they both realized that they were operating in two different time zones, and neither of them had confirmed which one.

Jim, unfortunately, doesn’t have any openings available to reschedule the interview tomorrow and Sadie is frustrated with the process thus far.

How should Sadie and Jim proceed?

Let’s look at the facts:

• Sadie is applying for a role and is willing to be flexible to secure the job with Humbolt Hardware, but she still wants to make the most of her time during the interview process.
• Jim’s schedule is busy and he has several interviews scheduled aside from Sadie’s.
• Neither Sadie nor Jim intended to miscommunicate the time of the interview and both made an effort to show up at the time they thought was correct.

The Resolution

The accommodating conflict resolution strategy is the most applicable in this situation. The bright side is, both individuals have some motivation to accommodate the other person.

Sadie wants to put her best foot forward and be a stand-out candidate for the role. Jim wants to vet all the candidates and fill the role as quickly as possible.

So long as both parties specify the time zone of the interview this time around, they’ll have solved the conflict in a way that is amicable and productive.

Manage and resolve conflicts like a pro.

Conflict is a complex thing to navigate, and we’d likely rather skip it altogether if we could. But conflict is a cornerstone of relationships, and when managed properly, it actually helps us strengthen those relationships and create better bonds.

While I know it’s difficult to do, I encourage you to lean into the conflict resolution strategies and skillsets we’ve talked about here the next time you’re faced with a conflict.

I specifically recommend being vulnerable, looking for common ground, and actively listening to the other party. These are skills that have served me well in my career, and I recommend them to anyone going through a workplace conflict.

By learning these conflict resolution strategies and leveraging the skillsets that make them so effective, you can create a safe environment for all parties to find a mutual solution.

Editor's note: This post was originally published in March 2019 and has been updated for comprehensiveness.