Very much motivational & informative. Wish to listen more.....

I am the author of the book 'THE PAIN OF LOVE' which is available on line onj Amazon .com.This book is all about the pains people encounter in their lives which leads other people to kill their partners before taking their own lives'Solutions to the problems as well as counseling for those whose relationships are on the rocks is availed in this book.It is called the pain of love as in most cases where there is love there is pain.The pain of longing for your partner.The pain of been denied sex during the time you desparetly wanted it.The pain of discovering that your partner has just finished to have sex with somebody else.The pain of having to hassle for money as your partner demands it from you.The pain of finding your partner kissing somebody while she\he less expected to see you there.The pain of discovering that your partner is cheating with a wealthy person. BELOW IS SOME ABSTRACTS FROM THE BOOK THE PAIN OF LOVE BY KEBANEILWE GAREBATHO:I LOVE YOU MORE THAN EVERYONE ELSE Your partner may at times tell you how much she loves you. She may say ‘I love you more than everybody else.’ In most cases partners never ask who everybody refers to. This statement may simply imply that your partner has other sexual partners but you are the most loved one. So every time you are in a relationship expect it to end any time because you are not the only person on this universe. Somebody else can take your partner away from you. But don't look for a secret partner thinking that your secret partner is your plan B. There is no way you are going to be happy, you will not as you will always be torn between the two. This complicates your life. If you have two partners, one of the two is going to suffer at the expense of the other. Getting a secret partner while you are in a relationship is a pre-mature move. It is wise to have one partner at a time. If it does not work out that is when you can start another relationship, when you are sure it is over. THE ABUSE OF POWER BY THOSE IN AUTHORITY People who have power either at work or in churches have a very significant contribution to lovers committing murder and suicide or passion killings. The two lovers start off by having a very stable relationship. Trials and tribulations are part of our lives. Though their relationship start off smooth, they soon face difficulties. The female partner may not be employed. After looking for a job for many years in vain, she may seek the intervention of the church elders or those in authority. When she goes to one of the churches in search of spiritual help, one of the ‘holly’ elders of the church propose to her. This woman is vulnerable since she has no source of income. The ‘man of God’ then promises her heaven on earth. He assures her that the moment they start sleeping together miracles will happen, she will get the job of her dreams. On hearing that she will finally have financial liberation and her partner will also benefit in this, she does not think twice before she accepts the proposal. After all she believes the spiritual man; to her she has the power to find a job for her. One wonders where this new affair leaves the partner who has been with the woman through thick and thin. This trusted member of the church takes advantage of the poor woman by abusing the word of God, he is a devil in disguise, he quotes the bible for his own purpose. The woman accepts the proposal not out of love but because she believes he has God’s power to help her. To her he is a symbol of God’s creation and power. After accepting the proposal, the trusted church member makes numerous appointments with her. They always meet in seclusion. He tells her that the appointments are in connection with her getting a job. The poor woman would keep on coming for these appointments. He tries by all means to have sex with this poor woman as soon as possible. She is not in a position to say no. They would have sex as many times as the man of God pleases. If the permanent partner of the sexually abused complains of her regular visits to the church, she tells him that her life is about to change for the better. She believes that in the near future she will get a job. Her partner tries by all means to see the change but there is none. The only change he notices is that she goes to church more than anybody else he knows. The appointments after church go on for a very long time but she does not get a job. When she asks him when she will get the job, he tells her to be patient as good things come to those who wait. He goes on to tell her that God’s blessings take time, it does not happen overnight. He then assures her that God is great and wonderful things are in store for her, when it happens she will be the happiest servant of God. When the woman hears how great the Lord is, she keeps on seeing him. The more she sees him the more she loves him. She trusts the man of God and believes whatever he tells her. PAGE 60 HIV INFECTION An individual is respected because of his/her position in society. Most people respect their fathers and mothers because they are the ones who brought them to this world. A president is respected because he is the head of state. If he wasn’t, the kind of respect bestowed on him would be nonexistent. Most people respect their sexual partners because of who they are. A rich person is respected for his wealth, if he wasn’t rich, no one would ever look at him twice. The same thing happens in a love relationship. If two lovers have had several HIV tests together and the results were negative, the two start to trust, love and respect each other greatly. They would respect one another for being sexually responsible even long before they met. Each one of them would feel safe to be with the other. HIV/AIDS won’t be a concern to the two lovers as they know their status. Sexual desires are difficult to control. Even those who are very responsible are sometimes tempted to be sexually involved with somebody else who isn't their permanent partners. The two love birds are negative while the third party, the secret lover, is infected with the HIV virus. One cannot look at an individual and diagnose them. It is impossible unless they have developed AIDS. Not many people are honest and ready to disclose their HIV status to their lovers. So if the man is tempted to have sex with a secret partner he may be carried away in the moment of passion that he forgets to protect himself. There is no such thing as a secret, it has a way of coming out. Eventually her partner learns i.e. there is a third party in their relationship, that she cheats him. The two try to talk getting infected then passing the HIV infection to him. As he thinks of death, he finds it difficult to share his experiences with other people. He just wants to go to bed and sleep so that he can think of the next course of action. He gives up everything and cares less about it. People out there appreciate the way he handles everything and the way they appear to be more loving to each other. People out there do not know of any problems in their relationship. They believe that they are the happiest couple ever seen on earth. They do not expect anyone of them to betray the other. So when the man is in bed, when he thinks of how faithful he was to his partner and her careless sexual acts, which drove him to be infected, he becomes very angry. He would toss in bed and will have difficulty in sleeping. When the woman tries to break the silence between them by asking him what their next step shall be, he is enraged. When he hears the question he assumes she is teasing him. How can she ask such a question when she is the one who infected him? The man feels that he is about to die and can ‘smell’ it. When he imagines what the deceased secret partner of his woman went through battling with AIDS before dying, he feels that the same thing is going to happen to him. Therefore he no longer cares. He knows that he is facing death anyway no matter what happens. He knows that he is going to die of HIV/AIDS related diseases. He views his partner as an evil who sentenced him to death. He curses the moment he met and does not want to be associated with her. When he thinks of how close and loving their relationship was and the HIV virus he has, he becomes very angry. He wishes to reverse the situation but it is impossible, it is too late. He can not help himself to get out of the situation he is already in. What is left is the anger and frustration at the fact that he is HIV positive. He thinks of sharing his torment with someone who can advice but can’t think of such an individual. This is made even more difficult by the fact that everybody termed them the perfect couple. What would they say if they were to know the problems they have? He is afraid of what the people will say. A lot of people trusted her and thought she was the perfect partner. He thinks the moment he confides in anyone they will point an accusing finger at him. How can they think she infected him when they never saw her with another man except him? He was the one who was always seen with a crowd of women around him. Who would believe him PAGE46 I LOVE YOU MORE THAN EVERYONE ELSE Your partner may at times tell you how much she loves you. She may say ‘I love you more than everybody else.’ In most cases partners never ask who everybody refers to. This statement may simply imply that your partner has other sexual partners but you are the most loved one. So every time you are in a relationship expect it to end any time because you are not the only person on this universe. Somebody else can take your partner away from you. But don't look for a secret partner thinking that your secret partner is your plan B. There is no way you are going to be happy, you will not as you will always be torn between the two. This complicates your life. If you have two partners, one of the two is going to suffer at the expense of the other. Getting a secret partner while you are in a relationship is a pre-mature move. It is wise to have one partner at a time. If it does not work out that is when you can start another relationship, when you are sure it is over. THE ABUSE OF POWER BY THOSE IN AUTHORITY People who have power either at work or in churches have a very significant contribution to lovers committing murder and suicide or passion killings. The two lovers start off by having a very stable relationship. Trials and tribulations are part of our lives. Though their relationship start off smooth, they soon face difficulties. The female partner may not be employed. After looking for a job for many years in vain, she may seek the intervention of the church elders or those in authority. When she goes to one of the churches in search of spiritual help, one of the ‘holly’ elders of the church propose to her. This woman is vulnerable since she has no source of income. The ‘man of God’ then promises her heaven on earth. He assures her that the moment they start sleeping together miracles will happen, she will get the job of her dreams. On hearing that she will finally have financial liberation and her partner will also benefit in this, she does not think twice before she accepts the proposal. After all she believes the spiritual man; to her she has the power to find a job for her. One wonders where this new affair leaves the partner who has been with the woman through thick and thin. This trusted member of the church takes advantage of the poor woman by abusing the word of God, he is a devil in disguise, he quotes the bible for his own purpose. The woman accepts the proposal not out of love but because she believes he has God’s power to help her. To her he is a symbol of God’s creation and power. After accepting the proposal, the trusted church member makes numerous appointments with her. They always meet in seclusion. He tells her that the appointments are in connection with her getting a job. The poor woman would keep on coming for these appointments. He tries by all means to have sex with this poor woman as soon as possible. She is not in a position to say no. They would have sex as many times as the man of God pleases. If the permanent partner of the sexually abused complains of her regular visits to the church, she tells him that her life is about to change for the better. She believes that in the near future she will get a job. Her partner tries by all means to see the change but there is none. The only change he notices is that she goes to church more than anybody else he knows. The appointments after church go on for a very long time but she does not get a job. When she asks him when she will get the job, he tells her to be patient as good things come to those who wait. He goes on to tell her that God’s blessings take time, it does not happen overnight. He then assures her that God is great and wonderful things are in store for her, when it happens she will be the happiest servant of God. When the woman hears how great the Lord is, she keeps on seeing him. The more she sees him the more she loves him. She trusts the man of God and believes whatever he tells her. PAGE 60 HIV INFECTION An individual is respected because of his/her position in society. Most people respect their fathers and mothers because they are the ones who brought them to this world. A president is respected because he is the head of state. If he wasn’t, the kind of respect bestowed on him would be nonexistent. Most people respect their sexual partners because of who they are. A rich person is respected for his wealth, if he wasn’t rich, no one would ever look at him twice. The same thing happens in a love relationship. If two lovers have had several HIV tests together and the results were negative, the two start to trust, love and respect each other greatly. They would respect one another for being sexually responsible even long before they met. Each one of them would feel safe to be with the other. HIV/AIDS won’t be a concern to the two lovers as they know their status. Sexual desires are difficult to control. Even those who are very responsible are sometimes tempted to be sexually involved with somebody else who isn't their permanent partners. The two love birds are negative while the third party, the secret lover, is infected with the HIV virus. One cannot look at an individual and diagnose them. It is impossible unless they have developed AIDS. Not many people are honest and ready to disclose their HIV status to their lovers. So if the man is tempted to have sex with a secret partner he may be carried away in the moment of passion that he forgets to protect himself. There is no such thing as a secret, it has a way of coming out. Eventually her partner learns i.e. there is a third party in their relationship, that she cheats him. The two try to talk getting infected then passing the HIV infection to him. As he thinks of death, he finds it difficult to share his experiences with other people. He just wants to go to bed and sleep so that he can think of the next course of action. He gives up everything and cares less about it. People out there appreciate the way he handles everything and the way they appear to be more loving to each other. People out there do not know of any problems in their relationship. They believe that they are the happiest couple ever seen on earth. They do not expect anyone of them to betray the other. So when the man is in bed, when he thinks of how faithful he was to his partner and her careless sexual acts, which drove him to be infected, he becomes very angry. He would toss in bed and will have difficulty in sleeping. When the woman tries to break the silence between them by asking him what their next step shall be, he is enraged. When he hears the question he assumes she is teasing him. How can she ask such a question when she is the one who infected him? The man feels that he is about to die and can ‘smell’ it. When he imagines what the deceased secret partner of his woman went through battling with AIDS before dying, he feels that the same thing is going to happen to him. Therefore he no longer cares. He knows that he is facing death anyway no matter what happens. He knows that he is going to die of HIV/AIDS related diseases. He views his partner as an evil who sentenced him to death. He curses the moment he met and does not want to be associated with her. When he thinks of how close and loving their relationship was and the HIV virus he has, he becomes very angry. He wishes to reverse the situation but it is impossible, it is too late. He can not help himself to get out of the situation he is already in. What is left is the anger and frustration at the fact that he is HIV positive. He thinks of sharing his torment with someone who can advice but can’t think of such an individual. This is made even more difficult by the fact that everybody termed them the perfect couple. What would they say if they were to know the problems they have? He is afraid of what the people will say. A lot of people trusted her and thought she was the perfect partner. He thinks the moment he confides in anyone they will point an accusing finger at him. How can they think she infected him when they never saw her with another man except him? He was the one who was always seen with a crowd of women around him. Who would believe him PAGE46He then borrows money from his friends and relatives and gives it to his partner. She becomes very happy and their relationship is revived. When the money finishes, trouble starts again. The man scratches his head again and wonders where to borrow the money. He goes to his friends, those he has not borrowed money from, and takes the money home. She is once again very happy. Eventually there is no one to borrow from, he owes all his friends and relatives. They want their money but he cannot repay them. He is broke and in debt. He avoids them like plague, he does not know what to tell them, he has no money to repay them. How can he explain that he borrowed money from them to make his partner happy? He becomes the hunted. People who lent him money want his blood. They want their money. At home the partner demands money from him. He has no peace of mind. When he is out he always looks over his shoulder for the people he owes. At home he has to endure the wrath of his partner who does not accept the fact that he has no money. This poor man is driven to steal in order to make her happy and stop nagging him. He may not only steal money but goods too. He then asks some of his friends to find a market for his loot. When by a chance he gets a buyer and gets a lot of money from it he spends part of it on his personal things then takes the rest to his partner . This man won’t stop stealing. The friends who helped him sell the stolen goods would ask him how he got away with it. He would tell them and warn them never to tell anyone as he will be in trouble with the police. When the friends imagine the large sum of money he had after selling the loot, they are tempted to do the same. This is the beginning of a criminal squad that later on terrorizes the entire village or town or city. The criminals would start by stealing individual as well as government property and sell them at a ridiculous price. The demanding partner then walks around with a smile on her face as money pours in everyday. She does not care where it comes from, it is none of her business. Eventually he gets caught. He would have hidden the stolen money/goods somewhere safe. When asked about the whereabouts of his loot, he doesn’t give out the information. No matter what means the pole officers PAGE 38

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